While I’ve been in random Yahoo! fantasy football leagues the last three years, this is the first year I’ve joined a league set up by a friend and actually participated in a live draft. So, I thought I would go the full disclosure route and list the players I picked up for what I think will be the league’s best just-below-.500 team.
Round 1: RB Frank Gore
Gore says he wants to get 2,000 yards in a season. I’ll need at least 20 of those yards to be from the 1 into the endzone.
Round 2: RB Willis McGahee
Yep, he gave up on the Bills, but he’s playing for the Ravens now. I’m counting on fear of Ray Lewis to motivate him and Brian Billick‘s lack of an offensive imagination to give him lots of opportunity. Besides, he’s been really productive.
Round 3: QB Drew Brees
On the plus side, he had a great season last year and an even better preseason. On the minus side, he is made of fine Waterford Crystal.
Round 4: WR Marques Colston
Why, yes, there was a run on wide receivers. How could you tell? Anyway, I’m sure all of the Saints opponents will have forgotten about his performance last season and won’t double-cover him or anything.
Round 5: WR Calvin Johnson
He might not have looked special in preseason, but he sure does in Madden 2008. Hopefully he’ll get used to the ball coming somewhere near him, since it won’t be thrown by Reggie Ball. Relax, Calvin. Embrace the easy catch.
Round 6: RB Adrian Peterson
The Minnesota rookie, not the one who’s going to play a lot for the Bears once they realize they are about to start the season with Cedric Benson at RB. Yep, I picked him because of one play against the Jets. That, and the fact Chester Taylor kept running into the line and falling down. I’ll look prescient.
Round 7: QB Ben Roethlisberger
Jon Kitna went one pick before this, meaning I’ll miss out on the 40+ touchdown passes he’ll be throwing in his mind. However, I will get to hear a lot about how Ben was so good two years ago, and so bad last year. To make up for it, every pass will be exciting.
Round 8: RB Thomas Jones
Heh, heh, heh…I’m so good…He’s going to be Curtis Martin this year. But will it be the great running back Curtis Martin, racking up an 1600+ yard season, or will it be retired Curtis Martin, eating chips on the sofa while watching the game?
Round 9: DEF Carolina
I make this pick every year. Every year I watch as division opponents just run up the middle every play.
Round 10: WR Jerry Porter
Hmm, one catch last year…I have a feeling he’ll improve that by at least 1000%.
Round 11: TE Dallas Clark
Dallas Clark rules! We get points for intangibles and downfield blocking, right?
Round 12: WR Muhsin Muhammad
Moose caught almost every single pass one season with the Panthers. He’s reliable, and Rex Grossman needs that. That, and someone to carefully hand him the ball from center, and then to point out where he should throw, and….
Round 13: WR Bernard Berrian
Another Bears wide receiver. Heck, somebody’s going to catch those Rex Grossman “passes,” and most of the time it will be a Bear. (The mind of the Sex Cannon is a dark and mysterious place.)
Round 14: WR Wes Welker
No, you’ve heard of him. Used to play for Miami. Gave the Patriots fits. Kicked some extra points for them. The sports magazines says he’s a QB’s best friend. Even caught Tom Brady’s baby when it came out. Impressed Bridget so much she secretly named the kid after him. The media says the last name is Moynahan, but it’s really Welker. And most importantly: He’s the Chosen of the Devil.
Round 15: K John Kasay
I did not see those two field goals get blocked…I did not see those two field goals get blocked…I did not see those two field goals get blocked…I did not see those two field goals get blocked…
And that’s it. It’s a lineup you could take out on the field and use to win the…uh…NFC South. Which is a proud accomplishment in its own right. 🙂